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There are a few different types of bad horror films and the 80's was the perfect decade to make all of them and have them be successful, for the most part. There were flicks that were so bad they're good, some that are just plain bad and a few other categories in between. Pieces, a slasher flick trying to capitalize on the success of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and the Friday the 13th franchise, falls a little closer to the just plain bad end of the spectrum. But, a few decent effects and some horribly bad dialogue as well as a kung fu attack that literally comes out of nowhere and leaves just as quickly raises Pieces to a mark just above plain bad.
A little boy kills his mother with an axe after she finds him putting together a jigsaw puzzle of a nude woman. Cut to 40 years later, someone is killing beautiful college coeds and taking their body parts to create the perfect woman. It's up to two detectives, and few unlikely allies, to stop the maniac that's on the loose.
After that promising opening, the film quickly goes down hill. The plot gets ludicrous when the police recruit one of the college students to help. Then, if that wasn't insane enough, they bring in a famous tennis star to help as well. Again, the effects are what raise the bar a tad with decapitation in broad daylight, and a halving complete with pants wetting, which is a nice realistic touch to me. I mean, if someone's coming at me with a chainsaw, you can bet your ass that I'm gonna piss my pants.
On to the acting. Even with the bad dialogue, most of the actors deliver it with a straight face, which is surprising given some of the situations they are in. Oh wait, nevermind, that's just bad dubbing. By far the best character is the groundskeeper Willard, played by Paul Smith. Many readers may remember him as Bluto from the live action Popeye movie, or possibly as Rabban in Dune. Anyways, he is absolutely hilarious every time he comes on screen. He seems to be the only one who gets how ridiculous this movie truly is.
How ridiculous you ask? The best example is when our undercover tennis star runs into some guy who busts out with all kinds of kung fu, then when she knocks him down, says he doesn't remember what happened, just that he was jogging and the next thing he knows he's on the ground. "Must be bad Chop Suey." And that is a direct quote. Followed closely by a scene in which our villain hides a chainsaw behind his back while in an elevator with his victim, and she doesn't notice!
Pieces tried very hard to capitalize on the success of such genre classics as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Friday the 13th, yet would have worked better as a parody instead of a serious film. But if you love 80's horror, it may be worth your while. For all others, grab a few friends and a lot of beer and sit back and take potshots at this horrible yet funny film.
One final note. For those in the Detroit area, be sure to keep a lookout for future screenings by 42nd St Drive-In at the Novi Emagine theater. Kind of sporadic in their scheduling but these guys love there horror and have provided a semi-regular opportunity to showcase some of the best (and worst) horror movies from the 70's and 80's. Many thanks to Jason Buchanan, Bob Felts and Brad Torreano for helping to broaden Detroit's horror fanbase.
4/10
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Movie/DVD Review: Pieces by ME
Saturday, September 13, 2008
DVD Review: The Nines by Mitch Emerson
I love movies that mess with your mind; that keep you guessing what is real and what is not. I am also a big fan of movies that have twists in them that change everything you thought you understood up until that one moment, that one situation or piece of information that usually comes out of nowhere and either brings realization to you and the characters, or turns their world and your perspective upside down. When they are done well, such as Donnie Darko, Memento, A Beautiful Mind and even the first Matrix film, we love them. When they are done badly – Nic Cage's Next is the first that comes to mind - they are such a let down. Bad “mindfuck” films, as I call them, leave you feeling cheated in the end. The Nines doesn't. It leaves you with questions for sure, but can also start some interesting conversation as it did with my wife and I.
The Nines is one of those that plays things a little different. You don't know what is happening pretty much from the get-go. Ryan Reynolds, Hope Davis and Melissa McCarthy play multiple roles in a film containing three separate, yet connected stories. The first, The Prisoner, is about an actor who is placed under house arrest. The second, Reality Television, follows a creator/showrunner of a television show in the style of it's own reality TV show, and the last, Knowing, is the story of a man trying to get help for him and his family whose car has broken down.
John August brings all of these actors together with a story that goes from cute to creepy, to confusing back to cute again almost effortlessly. There are only a few times that would be considered WTF!? and those moments still keep you interested instead of pulling you out of the movie. There is also an underlying (well not so underlying - it kind of smacks you in the head at one point) spiritual message that can be interpreted many different ways and yet not be preachy. Hell, I'm not even sure if it was meant to be spiritual or sarcastic or just thought provoking.
This is a film that will take multiple viewings to make complete sense of, but is enjoyable enough that I won't mind watching a few times.
9/10
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Monday, August 25, 2008
What I watched This Week- 08/15-08/22 by ME
136. 08/14/08 – Oldboy – 9/10 – Great foreign movie about revenge. Confusing at times but a super dark ending, but a great story.
137. 08/16/08 - Juno - 10/10 - My mother wanted to watch it, she had never seen it. See full review.
138 - 08/17/08 - Bird on a Wire - 6/10 - Mom bought it at a garage sale. i twas this or Pretty Woman. Easily forgettable.
139. 08/20/08 - Secretary - 7/10 - Another that is a second viewing. It takes a leap of faith when their relationship crosses the line of appropriateness. Otherwise a decent if unorthodox love story.
Movie Review: Star Wars: Clone Wars by ME
Clone Wars follows Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi's exploits during the period between Episode II and Episode III. The lead off for an animated TV series which will air on the Sci-Fi Channel as well as TNT this fall, Clone Wars holds up in the well established Star Wars universe, with a few grievances. It's not a bad film, there are just a few things that really hurt this ambitious project.
The story goes like this – Darth Sidious and Count Dooku have kidnapped Jabba the Hutt's son in order to fake a rescue so they can get Jabba on the side of the Separatists. Obi-Wan and Anakin, along with Anakin's precocious new padawan, Ahsoka Tano, must actually rescue Jabba's son for the same reason, as well as to expose Dooku and his apprentice Asajj Ventress for what they truly are.
I know it isn't a very strong plot but this is the lead off for a TV show that is aimed at children as well as hardcore fans. And that is where the problem lies. Amidst rather brutal scenes of clone trooper deaths and massive destruction, scenes of over humanized and way, way over the top humorous battle droids have been added for comic relief. If the pendulum didn't swing so fast and far between brutal and humorous, it might have worked. Well, at least Jar Jar Binks doesn't show up. Another point of contention is the lack of John Williams famous score. It's there, but “re-imagined” or “updated” some may say, but it didn't work for me, at least for the beginning and end credits, that is. When I go to a Star Wars film I want that first, familiar, blaring note to blast out at me and make it feel like I am returning to something familiar and well loved.
Most of the voice acting is spot on, however, the voice used for Chancellor Palpatine stands out like a sore thumb among voices who at least try to match their real life counterparts. Which is really too bad as the voice actor who plays him – Ian Abercrombie, does a decent Darth Sidious, but as Palpatine is sorely lacking. Anakin's voice, provided by Matt Lanter is even better for Anakin than Hayden Christensen, less whiny and a tad more serious while still retaining some of the impertinence from Christensen's performance. And James Arnold Taylor's Obi-Wan brings forth a well set tone of authority and wisdom that fits Obi-Wan to a T. Some of the best work was for Yoda and Padme, Tome Kane and Catherine Tabor respectively. I was surprised to find it wasn't Frank Oz and Natalie Portman voicing them since they had gotten Samuel L. Jackson, Anthony Daniels and Christoipher Lee to reprise their roles.
As well as as decent voice cast, Clone Wars has some great animation, even if some of the character design is slightly lacking. The battle scenes are gorgeous, continuing what was previously showcased in Episode's II and III. The lightsaber duels were tight and beautifully choreographed except for the fight between Obi-Wan and Asajj Ventress which seemed a little jerky at times. But, ever since the original trilogy, I have always been excited to see what a Jedi in his/her prime can do and I have not been disappointed with the prequels, and Clone Wars continues to wow me with the feats of the Jedi.
All in all. Clone Wars may not be a perfect Star Wars film, but I will be watching every episode that is aired, if only to see how Ahsoka fairs by being trained by the future Darth Vader. I mean, you know it isn't going to end well right? Some have said that giving Anakin a padawan ruins established continuity, but I believe we will just have to see how everything turns out.
7/10
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Friday, August 15, 2008
New Feature: What I Watched This Week by ME
Now I don't review everything I watch. If I did, I would never stop writing. I have, however, started a list of movies that I have watched for the entire year. I won't bore you with the entire list so far, but I will start posting each weeks additions with a thought or two on the film. And actually, this first post will cover the last two weeks as I had some minor surgery last Thurs. and wasn't up to posting.
Also, I am not including TV shows here either, that's why the list is a little lean as I have been catching up on season 1 of Burn Notice, series 2 of Spaced and seasons 2 and 3 of Weeds. Feel free to post comments or ask me to expound on any of the movies.
Mitch Emerson
127. 08/01/08 - POTC: At World's End – 8/10 - Less confusing than the first time I saw it, but the effects more than make up for minor bitches about the convoluted plot. Some of the humor takes you away from the darker tone of the third film.
128. 08/02/08 - Charlie Bartlett – 8/10 - Entertaining and fun film that lets Anton Yelchin finally lead, instead of being upstaged by Justin Timberlake. See full review
129. 08/05/08 - 28 Weeks Later - A decent sequel. Minor issues with zombie dad which were sort of explained as he holds on to some logic. See full review.
130. 08/06/08 - Batman (1966) – 3/10 - Way too campy for even a big Batman fan like myself.
131. 08/06/06 - Stand By Me – 10/10 - One of the best adaptations of a Stephen King story.
132. 08/07/08 - Jumper - 6/10 - Not as bad as most have said. Seriously missing character development as well as being badly edited. See full review
133. 08/07/08 - Bicentennial Man - 8/10 - It feels a little long, but nothing really feels extemporaneous. The love story seems a tad weird, but helps set up a wonderful ending.
134. 08/08/08 - The Bank Job – 7/10 - Rented it for Jason Statham, sadly he doesn't kick any ass. Not a bad heist film, a little convoluted for my taste.
135. 08/10/08 – 1408 – 8/10 - Decent adaptation of a Stephen King story. Dragged a little in the middle.
136. 08/14/08 – Oldboy – 9/10 – Great foreign movie about revenge. Confusing at times but a super dark ending and a great story.
DVD Review: Jumper by ME
In Jumper, David Rice (Hayden Christensen) is a guy who can teleport. Does he use this skill to help the world? No, he uses it to rob banks and get the girl (Rachel Bilson). But does this make him a bad guy? Not really, although it seems to me that he does have some moral issues which make him a questionable “hero” for the film. Anyways, enter Roland (Samuel L Jackson), leader of a group of fanatics called Paladins, who just want to kill all jumpers since they believe no one should wield such power. Jamie Bell pops in as a mentor who is also a lone wolf type.
Now it's established early on that David has had a rough childhood, which explains why he isn't a nice guy, but there could have been more. Also shown is him watching people trapped in a flood on tv and he does nothing to help. Even though Christensen's acting has improved over his stint in the Star Wars prequels, as a character, I still have more sympathy for Anakin. I mean, David is technically a criminal even though the Paladins that are after him seem to be zealots themselves.
It seems to me that Sam Jackson was just collecting a paycheck on this one if we hadn't already known about his big interest in comic books and sci-fi. I mean Unbreakable and the Star Wars prequels should be hint enough. And as much as Hayden's skills as an actor have improved and Sam Jackson is, well, Sam Jackson, the most believable is Rachel Bilson, who is confused for most of the film. But with the story as confusing as it is, she may not actually be acting. Then she decides she doesn't want any part of David's predicament, which hopefully mirrors her feelings for her involvement in the film or any sequels that may or may not happen.
I know the movie is called Jumper, but does it have to jump from scene to scene? At times, Jumper seems hastily put together and edited. And all the jumping to and from public places, not exactly a smart thing to do when the “badder” guys are after you. I say “badder” as we have already established that David isn't a saint himself, even though he is trying to save the girl. He treats her like crap, but hey, it's the thought that counts right? Some missed opportunities include the dynamic between David and his mother, which would help any sequel that gets made. Hell any kind of character development would help.
While the effects are nothing super special, their use is. The choreography of the fight scenes incorporating the jumping technique adds a little oomph to an otherwise lackluster film. After watching the special features, I learned that the effects were toned down on purpose, which makes sense. As well as the fact that it was planned from the get go that there was going to be three movies, if the first did well enough. Most interesting though is a section called Previz: Future Concepts, which were animatics that seems to be from future movies since they didn't look familiar at all. The action in those sequences is gonna be pretty interesting and should bring the action to the next level if future movies are made. Also a few trailers and commentaries, but since this was a rental I didn't get the chance to listen to.
Jumper is, at best, a way to waste some free time, if you don't have anything better to do.
5/10
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
DVD Review: Charlie Bartlett by ME
Charlie just wants to fit in, that's all. But having been raised in a wealthy family and having gone to private schools his whole life, it's no surprise that he has problems when he has to go to public school. When the family doctor prescribes Ritalin needlessly, Charlie sells them and instantly becomes the man to know. This somehow leads to him becoming the school "shrink". Now in real life I think he would just become a straight up dealer, but Yelchin's Bartlett is a nice enough kid that it might happen. And then the inevitable fall comes and Charlie must redeem himself, but it seems to get harder at every turn.
The main reason I wanted to see Charlie Bartlett was because of Anton Yelchin's performance in Alpha Dog. The boy was phenomenal (except for his singing), and he was only upstaged by a surprisingly good performance by Justin Timberlake, and is instantly likable in this as well. As we all know, Robert Downey Jr. may not be the best person to portray a person of authority, especially a principal, but he is pretty much believable, if unconventional. Kat Dennings is interesting here. I really like her and she does admirably in Charlie Bartlett, but I can't really see her as a leading lady. Great as a love interest, but I don't think she could carry a film all by herself. After those individual observations, I must say that the chemistry between all of the cast works remarkably well.
Special Features include two commentaries, one with the director and writer, and one with the director and Anton Yelchin and Kat Dennings. There isn't much besides those, just a music video and a strange little thing called "Restroom Confessional", which seems to be the cast and crew ad libbing confessions like in the movie. Not much here, but it's not a big budget, effects laden film that deserves a ton of features, but a making of would have been nice.
In the end, Charlie Bartlett is the story of a reluctant hero who must take responsibility for his action and become the real hero that everyone thinks he is. Do I recommend it? Yes I do. Why? Because it's an entertaining movie with a cast that really works together and has just enough of a serious undercurrent to keep it slightly grounded in semi-reality.
If they ever decide to remake Ferris Bueller's Day Off (Please don't!), they could do worse than casting Anton Yelchin as Ferris.
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Don't forget to Digg it!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Motor City Nightmares Convention Report by ME
By Mitch Emerson
The Motor City Nightmares convention was held this past weekend and yours truly was able to attend this fledgling event on Saturday. Even though George Romero had to cancel his appearance to do a film project, there was no shortage of famous guests. We had Jason himself (Kane Hodder), Michael Myers (Tony Moran) and even the Candyman (Tony Todd)! Surprise last minute addition was Tobe Hooper, director of the classic Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Poltergeist. For the classic horror fans who could resist a 40 year reunion for the cast of the original Night of the Living Dead? In attendance was Kyra Schon, Bill Hinzman, Judith O"Dea, Marilyn Eastman, John Russo, George Kosana and Russell Streiner. Other attendees included James Russo, Caroline Williams and Monique Dupree.
[READ MORE AT FATALLY-YOURS.COM]
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Movie Review: The Dark Knight by ME
Wow, just holy jeez wow. The Dark Knight has exceeded any and all expectations that I had, which actually weren't that high because I avoided as much hype and spoilers as possible. My intrigue was only piqued by the trailers and some of the ingenious, if not overdone viral marketing. The best Batman film, if not the best comic book movie of all time. Scratch that, I'm sticking to my guns, The Dark Knight IS the best comic book movie ever, and this is coming from a guy with comic book character tattoo's and a closet filled with longboxes.
How can I convince you of that? Sadly, I don't think I can. This is one that you will just have to trust me on and see for yourself. The story has plenty of twists and turns that spin a web of a story that weaves tightly together and comes to a seat gripping climax. Everything builds up nicely, but not slowly. We start with a bang of a bank robbery that introduces us to the Joker and shows just how ruthless he is. And it only gets better. Even things from the trailer that didn't work for me redeem themselves. Take the Bat-Pod for instance. Stupid name, and with those huge tires it looks almost unbelievable, but when this thing bursts onto the screen and you really get to see it in action, it's pretty slick. We also get to see more of the evolution of the Batsuit itself. I won't say anything as I don't want to spoil anything, but it is an interesting thing to see that Batman doesn't know everything about everything even after doing this for a year or so.
Yes it was a shame that Heath Ledger passed on shortly after completing filming, but we have heard all about that that we really need, or care to. I am only going to judge his performance based on his performance and he really does become the Joker. Not one single speck of Heath Ledger comes through here. He really is a psychotic mad dog that has been taken off his leash to wreak havoc. I can understand why he had issues sleeping during and after filming. Hell, I'm gonna have trouble sleeping after watching it! Christian Bale proves his worth once again both as Bruce Wayne and Batman. Both have grown in ways. We see Batman come to the realization and acceptance of just what his role as Gotham's “Dark Knight” truly needs to be. Watching Aaron Eckhart's Harvey Dent is just as awesome. His character's rise and fall really hits you because he truly is a hero in the true sense of the word, even Batman admits this at one point. And to see his fall from grace is just heartbreaking. Maggie Gyllenhaal is 100% stronger as Rachel Dawes than Katie Holmes was and that's all that really needs to be said about her, right? Gary Oldman gets a more interesting chunk of the story to work with this time as we see how he comes to be the Police Commissioner, team him with Harvey Dent and Gotham wouldn't need a Batman. Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman round out the cast but are little more than supporting characters this time around. It was also nice to see Scarecrow again, albeit only briefly, to help tie up one loose end from Batman Begins.
In a nutshell? The Dark Knight is the end all Batman movie, plain and simple. No real flaws to speak of. Great story, great pace, great acting, great action, just plain great.
10/10
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Thursday, July 17, 2008
DVD Review Link: Otis by ME
Otis is a welcome addition to the horror-comedy genre without tipping over into the land of parody such as films like Black Sheep and Shaun of the Dead. Otis is at first, instilled with just enough humor to take the edge off while letting us inside the head of two types of people: The psychopath Otis (Bostin Christopher) himself, who just wants to have his perfect Prom night (at least 25 years too late) and the Lawsons, his latest victims family played wonderfully by Daniel Stern, Illeana Douglas, and Jared Kusnits. Kevin Pollak turns in a different performance as Otis's older, meaner brother whose life Otis is trying to emulate, something that isn't directly addressed but you pick up along the way. What makes this film different than other psychopath/serial killer flicks is that the Lawsons get their revenge, which is where the fun really begins. Taking a few unexpected turns is always a good thing in these types of movies, and Otis pulls darkness, humor, tension and a great soundtrack into a tight and different type of film.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Movie Review: The Incredible Hulk by ME
I may be one of the few who actually liked Ang Lee's version of the Hulk. Sure, we didn't see the Hulk until an hour in. Sure I was lost by the end, just as everyone else was. I liked the comic book transitions between scenes, even if it was over used a bit. And the Hulk himself was pretty awesome. Too bad the best fight was against a pack of ridiculous looking giant radioactive dogs, including a poodle. In a nutshell Ang added a little too much Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon to a film that should have been “HULK SMASH!” for an hour and a half or so.
Well, Louis Leterrier has fixed just about everything that needed fixing. For those not in the know, Marvel chose to “reboot” the Hulk franchise instead of doing an out and out sequel. This movie is a tale of a Bruce Banner on the run, trying to stay one step ahead of General T. “Thunderbolt” Ross, while trying to find a cure, while also trying to avoid situations that would cause him to turn into the Hulk. I swear, it's not easy being green. And to add to it, Ross has brought in Emil Blonsky and given him a “Super Soldier Serum” (Yes, it's the same stuff that creates Captain America) which makes him stronger and faster so he can get a rematch with the Hulk. Things go wrong (of course!) and Blonsky becomes The Abomination, a monster that only the Hulk has the power to deal with.
Edward Norton may be seen in the press as a prima donna with his insistence on having creative control as well as shunning all publicity for The Incredible Hulk, but I'll forgive him for that since he has helped to deliver a great Hulk film. Performance wise, he is just about perfect. All of the cast is. Liv Tyler, William Hurt, and Tim Roth all deserve a pat on the back.
I have to say that The Incredible Hulk has the best cgi since The Lord of the Rings. Ok, well, the hair on the Hulk does need a little work but watching the Hulk's muscles ripple and his hands shake as he screams his rage is something you have to see on the big screen. Gone is the pretty, artistic Hulk that Ang Lee brought us. This is a down and dirty Hulk who just wants to be left alone. And that is what really got me in The Incredible Hulk, we get to see two giant creatures beating the living crap out of each other until only one is left standing. THAT is what comic fans in general, and Hulk fans in particular, have been waiting for.
With little nods to the comics and the TV show, Hulk is an action packed slugfest peppered with feeling and comedic bits that don't go over the top. A must see for any comic or action movie fan. If Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk is what Marvel comes back with after let downs like X3, Ghost Rider, Daredevil and Electra, and with the promise of Captain America, Thor, and The Avengers on the distant horizon, then make mine Marvel!
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Review Link: The Mental Dead by ME
Fatally-Yours.com has sent me a screener for a no-budget horror flick ($80, no kidding) called The Mental Dead. I must have been Mental for watching it. Here is a portion of the review. A link to the full review follows.
I am usually pretty hard on low budget horror films even though I admire the courage it takes to pick up a camera, get out there, and shoot a movie. Due to a recent discussion with Fatally-Yours.com’s own Dr. Royce Clemens, I learned that production values should not be the focus of a review of a film of this type. Unfortunately The Mental Dead lacks the other attributes as well, namely a plot and acting. So I will “discuss” all three aspects.
The film opens with four college kids in a car, one injured, in front of a high school overrun with zombies. Our heroes, Crash and Tyler, show up, convince the kids to go into the school where a lame game of cat and mouse begins. Will they survive? Who cares…
First – When a German actor has one of the most fake sounding German accents of all time it cannot be a good thing. Konrad Brattke’s death could not come soon enough, and I mean that literally. When we first meet him, he has already had his throat cut or bitten, which is spurting blood and yet it took him ten minutes to die.http://www.fatally-yours.com/horror-reviews/the-mental-dead/
Keep reading,
Mitch E
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Movie Review: Cloverfield by ME
Title: Cloverfield
Starring: Lizzy Caplan, T.J. Miller, Michael Stahl-David, Mike Vogel, Michael Stahl-David
Directed By: Matt Reeves
Produced By: Sherryl Clark, Guy Riedel, J.J. Abrams
Genre: Action/Adventure, Comedy, Drama and Thriller
Running Time: 1 hr. 24 min.
Release Date: January 18th, 2008 (wide)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 for violence, terror and disturbing images.
Distributors: Paramount Pictures
9/10
Cloverfield is a Godzilla type movie yet both less and more at the same time. Innovative story telling told through the lens of a video camera found in Central Park by the Department of Defense with no narration, explanation or anything. The whole story is told by the videotape recorded by a group of friends in an eight hour period as they try to rescue another friend and escape the city when a creature attacks New York.
The “acting” is phenomenal when taken in context. No deep conversations or useless dialogue to continue the story. Nope, this is just four young adults scared out of their minds and doing the best that they can. Due to the lack of character development you don't really care who they are, the raw emotion of the situation is enough to make you care what happens to these people who just happen to live in the wrong city at the wrong time.
Except for those two minor issues Cloverfield is one hell of an creative movie that delivers the scares and tension in a whole new way.
I'm Mitch Emerson, and I approve of this movie.
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Friday, January 11, 2008
Movie Review: The Orphanage by ME
Title: The Orphanage
Starring: Belén Rueda, Fernando Cayo, Roger Príncep, Geraldine Chaplin, Montserrat Carulla (II)
Directed By: Juan Antonio Bayona
Produced By: Guillermo del Toro, Mar Targarona, Álvaro Augustin
Genre: Art/Foreign, Suspense/Horror and Thriller
Running Time: 1 hr. 45 min.
Release Date: December 21st, 2007 (wide)
MPAA Rating: R for some disturbing content.
Distributors: Picturehouse
My rating: 9/10 (Only because I don't like subtitles, lol)
With the intention of opening a home for sick and disabled children, Laura (Belén Rueda) moves into the orphanage she grew up in, along with her husband, Carlos (Fernando Cayo), and their son, Simón (Roger Príncep). As the opening of the home approaches Simón's small group of imaginary friends grows, hinting at something more than child's play. Before opening day is over Simón disappears, pulling Laura into a dark game that threatens to destroy her sanity.
A quick review for a movie that really needs to be seen in order to believe just how good it is, The Orphanage is by far the scariest movie I have seen in a long, long time. Director Juan Antonio Bayona takes his cues from producer Guillermo Del Toro using the same dark fantasy storytelling that was prevalent in Del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth, making me wonder if Del Toro pulled a Poltergeist and had more to do with the film than we are led to believe, just as Steven Spielberg “lent a helping hand” to Tobe Hooper in directing Poltergeist.
Speaking of Poltergeist, the best way to describe The Orphanage would be to take Poltergeist, The Haunting and Pan's Labyrinth and put them in a blender, mix, and then sprinkle a little bit of The Others on top. Bayona uses suspense like a master, building tension out of nothing at all. I found myself sitting on the edge of my seat for no reason at all. Low angles are used where you would expect to see a hand snake out of the darkness. Or a far away shot where you expect someone to step into frame watching the lead characters. Those are just a few examples of how he creates tension and keeps it up by not using those moments, instead opting to keep the tension tight. The creepy sound design and eerie music add to the overall tone of the film quite nicely.
For once there is a movie where the performances take a backseat to the story itself, which is a good thing, because as with Pan's Labyrinth, it is hard to judge an actors ability when you can't speak their language. You don't get the cadence and tone and inflection that we use to judge the actors ability to project emotion. On the other hand, a performance can also be graded on body language and the ability to express emotion with your eyes, and that is how I judged the actors in The Orphanage. We spend most of the movie with Belén Rueda, who plays Laura. She carries the film well as a distraught mother who knows her son is still alive. Her anguish comes across quite clearly as she knows what to do, but not how to do it. While Fernando Cayo,as Laura's husband, has a few scenes where you can see in his eyes how much he cares for Laura and how helpless he feels because he doesn't know how to help her while in other scenes, it seems he's just going through the motions.
If you liked the Pan's Labyrinth, you will like The Orphanage, trust me. Even if you haven't seen Pan's Labyrinth, like horror films and can handle subtitles, then see The Orphanage. With scares, plot twists, atmosphere and just all around plain creepiness, The Orphanage is what I consider to be a prime example of suspense/horror.
Until Guillermo Del Toro and Clive Barker collaborate,
keep reading
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Movie Review: Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street by ME
Title: Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street
Starring: Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Sacha Baron Cohen, Alan Rickman, Timothy Spall
Directed By: Tim Burton
Produced By: Patrick McCormick, Laurie MacDonald, Walter F. Parkes
Genre: Drama, Musical/Performing Arts, Thriller and Adaptation
Running Time: 1 hr. 57 min.
Release Date: December 21st, 2007 (wide)
MPAA Rating: R for graphic bloody violence.
Distributors: DreamWorks SKG, Paramount Pictures, Warner Bros. Pictures International
My rating: 6/10
Sweeney Todd a.k.a Benjamin Barker (Johnny Depp) returns to London after being sent away by Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman) with the help of a sailor, Anthony Hope (Jamie Campbell Bower). He opens a barber shop above Mrs. Lovett's Meat Pie Shop were she sells "the worst pies in London." With the help of Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter), Todd tries to get rid of all the people who have ever done him wrong and hopes to be reunited with his daughter, Johanna (Jayne Wisener), who is now Judge Turpin's ward.
That being said I am of two minds about Sweeney Todd. On one hand I loved the story, but there was too much music. I know, I know it's a musical, but it is my review. I can handle musicals if there is decent ratio of dialogue to musical numbers and unfortunately, there is much more of the latter. Not only is there a ton of music but for the most part it is almost overpowering and most definitely over the top. Many repeat themes and numbers make the musical portion of Sweeney Todd a chore to really get into at times.
Until Johhny Depp and Tim Burton stop making films together,
keep reading
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Friday, December 21, 2007
Movie Review: National Treasure: Book of Secrets by ME
Title: National Treasure: Book of Secrets
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Diane Kruger, Ed Harris, Helen Mirren, Justin Bartha
Directed By: Jon Turteltaub
Produced By: Chad Oman, Mike Stenson, Oren Aviv
Genre: Action/Adventure and Sequel
Running Time: 2 hrs. 4 min.
Release Date: December 21st, 2007 (wide)
MPAA Rating: PG for some violence and action.
Distributors: Buena Vista Pictures Distribution
My Rating: 6/10
2004's National Treasure is a film that really didn't need a sequel, but it was inevitable. Take a tried and true story, adventurer seeks fame and fortune, and you can't lose right? Indiana Jones did it, Allan Quartermain did it, Lara Croft did it and now we get to see Ben Gates do it again.
This time around Ben Gates (Nicolas Cage) is ostensibly seeking to clear Thomas Gates (his great-grandfather) name in the conspiracy to assassinate Abraham Lincoln, but it always boils down to the treasure. Mitch Wilkinson (Ed Harris) is the man who brought these accusations against Thomas Gates in order to manipulate Ben into doing all of the work for him. Of course Riley (Justin Bartha), Abigail (Diane Kruger) and Ben's father Patrick (Jon Voight) are along for the ride.
National Treasure: Book of Secrets doesn't live up to it's predecessor. The first film had a great sense of humor that worked well but BOS can't seem to get the wit down this time. Also, liberal rearranging of historical facts and an extremely convoluted plot with segments that don't really add to the story weighs BOS down.
Nicolas Cage reprises his role as Benjamin Gates just the same as before, no real growth for him and his character. The real let down though is Justin Bartha's Riley. In the first film he was a semi-clueless tech expert who delivered his sarcastic lines with a timing that made him second only to Cage. In BOS, he has matured a little which means some of the humor is gone. Diane Kruger returns as Abigail Chase and just like the first film, is dragged along for the ride. Jon Voight chews up the scenery with a performance that at time reminded me heavily of Sean Connery's Dr. Jones Sr. in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade while new addition Helen Mirren knocks what little screen time she has out of the park. Lastly is Ed Harris as Mitch Wilkerson. A great actor who has played heroic roles in The Abyss and Needful Things, and as a good/bad government agent in A Beautiful Mind brings elements of all of these to Mitch. He wants the Wilkerson family name to go down in history and is willing to do anything to do it.
National Treasure: Book of Secrets doesn't quite live up to it's potential but it is a fine family alternative to seeing whatever cutesy animated film that is releasing this week.
Until National Treasure: The Temple of Doom, oops, that's been done before,
keep reading
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Movie Review: Juno by ME
Title: Juno
Starring: Ellen Page, Michael Cera, Olivia Thirlby, Jennifer Garner, Jason Bateman
Directed By: Jason Reitman
Produced By: Joe Drake, Nathan Kahane, Daniel Dubiecki (II)
Genre: Comedy, Drama and Teen
Release Date: Various
MPAA Rating: PG-13 for mature thematic material, sexual content and language.
Distributors: Fox Searchlight Pictures
Juno takes a serious situation and makes it extremely funny without crossing the line into absurdity, while also never letting you forget that teen pregnancy is not a joking matter. Sixteen year old Juno (Ellen Page) gets pregnant by best friend Paul Bleeker (Michael Cera) and decides to give the baby up for adoption to couple Vanessa and Mark Loring (Jennifer Garner and Jason Bateman). While dealing with her pregnancy Juno must also contend with her rather cool parents and figure out her feelings towards Bleeker. Things go from bad to worse when problems between Mark and Vanessa cast a shadow over Juno's hopes. All of this adds up to be one of the best movies of the year.
Following up 2005's Thank You For Smoking, Jason Reitman, son of director Ivan Reitman, shows that he has inherited his father's talent for comedy. A rather quirky film that should appeal to todays audiences with it's wit, likeable if not lovable characters portrayed by a perfect cast, and way too many comedic verbal fusillades to count, Reitman and Cody surely have a hit with Juno.
Ellen Page will be a star in the near future. After the cult hit Hard Candy and her small role in the mainstream X-Men 3: The Last Stand. Page comes through once again as a talent to be reckoned with. Perfect comedic delivery and the ability to turn serious without being melodramatic is one of her key talents. Michael Cera still bugs me a bit, the kid seriously needs to man up a little. I have only seen him in Superbad and Juno but there is basically no difference in either character. Sure he's funny in these situations, but he's going to be pigeon holed if he doesn't show some variety soon. J.K. Simmons and Alison Janney almost steal a few scenes away from Page as her parents. The best way to describe them is the most realistic version of a teens fantasy parents. Simmons is great in every scene but watch for Janney's tirade against a snobbish ultrasound technician, it's one of the best scenes in the movie. Jason Bateman and Jennifer Garner are great as the proposed adoptive parents. They don't seem to fit together perfectly, which may have been done on purpose, but Bateman plays the slightly whipped husband perfectly. I know a few guys whose stuff has been relegated to one room in the house and can feel for Bateman. Garner, having just had a child in real life with husband Ben Affleck, probably didn't need to dig too deep for motivation in this film, which makes her performance that much better. Last mention is a quick cameo by Rainn Wilson of The Office, who has one of the best lines in the film as a lowly convenience store clerk.
Even though I haven't given many reasons to see Juno, I can only say that it is a package deal. The closest thing I can even consider a flaw is the dialogue. I don't think that many teens actually speak the way these characters do, but if you can get around that, then Juno is for you. Aside from that, Juno is by far one of the best comedies I have seen in a long time that doesn't feature gross out humor. It has already become one of my favorite films and will be a welcome addition to my collection.
There are multiple release dates for Juno for different cities. Head here to see when Juno opens in your city.
Until Juno 2, Juno Junior,
keep reading
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Jason Reitman/Diablo Cody interview for Juno by ME
I feel that I need to explain why this interview ended up being so short. See, Jason Reitman and Diablo Cody turned out to be two of the nicest and coolest people I have met. When I first got there, Jason, who by the way was wearing a Ghostbusters t-shirt, commented on my tattoos. (For those that don't know, I have quite a few tattoos of comic book characters) and then Diablo walked in and literally screamed when she saw the tattoo of Rogue from the X-Men on my leg. So a good amount of the alloted time was spent chatting about tattoos, the IMDB and truck driving. For those interested, I will be posting the full interview with all the chit chat on www.velvetropereviews.com in the near future.
ME: In Juno. how hard was it to ride that line between being funny and being serious?
Diablo Cody: You know, that’s always really tough. Originally I didn’t really set out to write a comedy strictly. And then it was my first screenplay, so I was still kind of discovering myself as a writer. As I moved forward I realized it definitely had a comedic voice to it. It was difficult because I always wanted it to be a little dark, and I always wanted it to be a little emotional but not too much so, so it was challenging. But the great thing about having a director who really understand the material is that he is very good at establishing tone, and so that perfect balance that you speak of is achieved.
ME: I didn’t see a lot that was dark, there were some little things….
DC: Yeah, not much left. Put it this way, I never imagined a cheerful orange and white poster when I was writing this movie. But Jason really brightened it up, and I’m glad that he did.
ME: I understand that you wrote a book so this becoming not quite a celebrity but more and more popular is kinda new, right?
DC: Yeah
ME: How has that treated you, and are you happy or do you wish you could go back?
DC: I’m incredibly happy, but at the same time it is a double edged sword, because you are praised and criticized in equal measure when you become a somewhat public figure.
Chit chat about IMDB
ME to Jason Reitman: You did a survey for the site trashwire.com for Thank You For Smoking. I was intrigued by one of your answers. I’m not a big fan of documentaries but This Film Has Not Yet Been Rated is one of my favorites. You had mentioned that if you had a billion dollars you would buy the MPAA and change how they do things. Have you had some kind of negative dealings with them?
JR: No no no, the MPAA has been very good to me. I don’t like a nanny state in film. I don’t like being told what to do, I don’t think people should be told what to do, I think people should be left to make decisions for themselves. That is somewhat at the core of both of my films, that people should be left to their own decisions.
Chat about This Film Has Not Yet Been Rated (which Cody hadn't seen yet) and the MPAA, and JR and DC chatting about their schedule, and truck driving
ME: I gotta ask, what kind of cool shit is going to be on the DVD?
JR: All kinds of cool shit. Deleted scenes, the original screen tests for the actors, there’s a music video that we cut together, there’s a blooper reel with a fake fight between me and Rainn Wilson, there’s a whole documentary on Diablo going from an internet blogger to a screen writer, some behind the scenes things. There’s like a Mystery Science Theater 3000 thing, Diablo and I deconstructing a scene like over our shoulders inside a movie theater. There’s tons of cool shit.
ME: I’ve always been a fan of the special features. Nowadays that’s more than half the reason to buy a DVD.
JR: The cool thing is, also, when you pee on the DVD case it tells you if you’re pregnant.
(laughter)
ME: Is it harder to direct established actors such as Bateman and Garner or younger talent like Cera and Page who are starting to make names for themselves?
JR: You know, every case is different, but on this film everything was easy. It was a delight with Jen, who’s very professional and very warm. And Jason is like the funniest guy you could have on set, so they make it very easy. And then Ellen and Michael are so easy going but so good and just tuning in to the perfect tone that there’s not many adjustments. You asked earlier about tonal adjustments….frankly that’s what made this movie so easy to do is that the actors were always kind of right there on the line and the adjustments that I would make would be very minor.
ME: Since Hollywood seems to be very sequel happy these days, at the drop of a hat for movies that really don’t deserve them, what you would see happening in a sequel?
DC: It’s hard for me to say because I feel so protective of the characters and I love them so much that I really want to freeze them in time and I don’t want them to have to go forward and experience any more.
JR: You talked a little bit about it…you know how Mark becomes an astronaut.
DC: Oh yeah, Mark becomes an astronaut.
JR: And he actually is the first guy to walk on Mars.
DC: It’s called Mission to Mark.
(laughter)
JR: And Vanessa and the baby actually become a singing duo, and they take their act on the road and they go worldwide. But then it’s actually kind of heartbreaking because they get into a fight over like are they artists or do they create product, and it breaks them apart which is kind of sad. Juno becomes an ice cream inventor for Baskin Robbins and works as a scientist inventing flavors of ice cream.
ME: I missed the screening last night but I figured that seeing it twice in one month was enough. How many times have you guys seen it?
JR: I edited it so for a few months I constantly was watching it.
ME: Once you’re all done with this, all the promotions and the DVD is out, how long does it usually take before you go back and watch it. Like how long has it been since you watched Thank You For Smoking just for the hell of it?
JR: Start to finish? I have not watched it completely through. If it’s on TV I’ll watch a scene or two, but it’s a little hard to watch. I would watch it with an audience if they’re liking it. Like if they were going to put it in theaters for a night I would totally go.
And we chatted for a few minutes about Cody's upcoming project Jennifer's Body, but that is a story for another time.
Movie Review: Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story by ME
Title: Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story
Starring: John C. Reilly, Jenna Fischer, Kristen Wiig, Tim Meadows, Raymond J. Barry
Directed By: Jake Kasdan
Produced By: Lewis Morton, Judd Apatow, Jake Kasdan
Genre: Comedy, Musical/Performing Arts and Biopic
Running Time: 1 hr. 36 min.
Release Date: December 21st, 2007 (wide)
MPAA Rating: R for sexual content, graphic nudity, drug use and language.
Distributors: Sony Pictures Releasing
My Rating: 7 out of 10
Dewey Cox knows the blues. From a childhood accident that left his brother cut in half to two failed marriages, from a father who shuns him to an evil addiction to drugs, Dewey feels the blues. This is his story.
Sounds like a biopic like Walk The Line doesn't it? Well, if you have been hiding under a rock the last few weeks and haven't seen any of the ads for Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, then let me tell you, it isn't. Walk Hard parodies Walk The Line and many other biopics. With sight gags that go beyond the crowning scene in Knocked Up to witty phrasings in song, Walk Hard is a solid effort that falls just shy of the mark made by Team Apatow's earlier efforts. That's not to say that it isn't a funny film, but it lacks the heart of Superbad, Knocked Up and The 40 Year Old Virgin.
Maybe I am putting too much blame on Apatow. Jake Kasdan, the director, could still be considered a little wet behind the ears with only Walk Hard, The TV Set, Orange County and Zero Effect under his belt film wise. To give him credit where deserved, he also directed a few episodes of Freaks and Geeks, the cult classic TV show that was the launching point for many of Apatow's regulars.
John C. Reilly really doesn't seem to be the kind of actor that should be able to play the lead in any film, and he covers that fact well. Reilly also wrote and sang most of the music in the film, which is quite impressive on it's own. What really helps is the supporting cast, most of which are familiar. Jenna Fischer, Kristen Wiig, Tim Meadows, David Krumholtz, Harold Ramis, Martin Starr and a few more all add their little pieces that add up to help Reilly make Walk Hard a decent comedy. Some nice cameos as well. Look for Frankie Muniz as Buddy Holly and Jack White as Elvis. And the best, Jack Black, Jonathan Schwartzman, Paul Rudd and Justin Long as The Beatles.
Final thoughts – While not one I would buy for my collection, Walk Hard is, at it's core, a funny movie that delivers the laughs, but falls short in character development. And I must warn you, there are a few shots of male full frontal nudity along with very suggestive, but very funny, lyrics in a few of the songs.
Keep reading,
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
Friday, December 14, 2007
Movie Review: I Am Legend by ME
Title: I Am Legend
Starring: Will Smith, Alice Braga, Dash Mihok, Salli Richardson-Whitfield, Charlie Tahan
Directed By: Francis Lawrence
Produced By: Erwin Stoff, Michael Tadross, Dana Goldberg
Genre: Action/Adventure, Science Fiction/Fantasy and Adaptation
Release Date: December 14th, 2007 (wide)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi action and violence.
Distributors: Warner Bros. Pictures Distribution
Disappointed. That is how I Am Legend left me feeling. Kind of like opening the greatest Christmas present ever and finding that the batteries didn't come with it and every single store is closed.
It's 2012, Robert Neville (Will Smith), is the last survivor living in New York after the “cure” for cancer mutated the rest of the population into bloodthirsty, light sensitive monsters. During the day he hunts and hits golf balls with his dog while waiting for other survivors to find him. But at night, he hides in fear of the mutated population that wants to kill him. Why? We don't know. And, Neville just happens to be a scientist trying to find a cure.
I Am Legend starts strong, with sweeping shots of a New York city gone to seed, slowly being reclaimed by nature. We learn what Neville does every day with little spots of Will Smith's trademark humor. Intermittently told through flashbacks and dreams is the story of what happened to the world and Neville's family in particular.
Will Smith does a great job of carrying the film pretty much on his own, being that he is the only actor onscreen during most of the film. By taking mannequins and posing them in a video store, he creates some semblance of the way life used to be. While this could be construed as crazy, you can plainly see that this is just a step in keeping his own sanity. He does have the required crying scene that seems to be in most of his recent films, but it is understandable in this film and I won't penalize Smith for it this time. Not much more can be said about the cast except for a neat little cameo by Emma Thompson as the Dr. who found the “cure”. Also, fans of the Sci-Fi Channel's Eureka may recognize Salli Blake. She plays Smith's wife in the flashbacks and is Allison Blake on Eureka.
Before I get to why the movie was disappointing, I want to say that the first three quarters were really good. It takes a combination of talents to keep a movie with mostly only one cast member interesting. Director Francis Lawrence coupled with Will Smith does this quite well. The effects are top notch. New York looks extremely creepy, reminiscent of the establishing shots of London in 28 Weeks Later but with the style of WETA's work on Peter Jacksons King Kong. The creatures are creepy without looking too dehumanized.
What doesn't work is the end. Feeling truncated and incomplete, I Am Legend could have easily added another twenty minutes to it's running time of an hour and forty minutes to provide a better sense of closure. I can't say any more without giving it away, sorry.
Notice that there was no mention of any of the other versions of this film. There have been two others, Omega Man starring Charleton Heston and The Last Man On Earth, starring Vincent Price. All three films were based on the novel by Richard Matheson, he who has penned What Dreams May Come and The Incredible Shrinking Man, among others. There was no mention because I haven't seen any of the others or read the book. Plan and simple.
All in all, I cared more for the dog than I did Robert Neville. What does that tell you?
Until Will Smith really is the last man on earth,
keep reading
Mitch Emerson
mitchemerson@hotmail.com
